1. Tom Brady, aka Dreamboat, is single again! Excellent.
2. J.J. Redick is actually playing in a game for the Orlando Magic. 9 minutes so far, but still. He actually got hotter since last year! Go figure. I guess a DUI and a Golden Shower will do that for you.
When I Die and They Give Me an Autopsy, They Will FindTwo Things When They Cut Me Open, 1. Aspirin and 2. Vaseline
World’s tallest man saves dolphin
The world’s tallest man has saved two dolphins by using his long arms to reach into their stomachs and pull out dangerous plastic shards. Mongolian herdsman Bao Xishun was called in after the dolphins swallowed plastic used around their pool at an aquarium in Fushun, north-east China. Attempts to use instruments failed as the dolphins contracted their stomachs.
Guinness World Records list Mr Bao, 54, as the world’s tallest living man at 2m 36.1cm (7ft 8.95in). Veterinarians turned to Mr Bao after attempts to extract the plastic shards at the aquarium in Fushun, Liaoning Province, had failed.
Via: BBC News
Hello!
Him: I booked a First name Last name segment for tonight
Me: do not First name Last name! that woman is evil. do you get paid overtime?
Him: No 
Which SUCKS, but I found out that starting in January I may start getting sponsored for my radio segment, which means I would get paid but would have to wear only clothes from ABC’s Warehouse, because I’ll be a spokesperson 
Me: SHUT UP.
why would a clothing company sponsor you on the radio? no one can see you? and would you have to say silly things like today paris hilton showed her hoo, but that’s not nearly important as my abc’s wearhouse double breasted tween suit coat?
am i missing the point? your job gets weirder by the day. i love it!
Me: *tween
Him: I’m half kdding about the sponsor—I will get sponsored but I would have to pre record things like, this segment brought to you by Bounty Towels and then I get like some money, it’s pretty sweet and about fucking time I get paid for all this extra work
Him: Haha—didn’t notice it the first time, but this sounds like something you’d buy at the Hannibal Lechter store
***************************************
Seriously, HED, no more Sudafed!
Email from my friend (we’re making cookies on sunday for gifts):
so, almond cookies, chocolate chip . . . anything else?
My reply:
hmmm, sugar cookies that we can frost? do you have cookie cutters? i have maple leafs and a lobster…actually come to think of it, that is like the epitomy of how weird I am…”i’m like oh i’ve got cookie cutters, a set of maple leafs and a lobster.” *sigh*
sorry tangent.
i’ll look at my cookbooks and see if anything looks fun.
*********************************************
Ok HED, enough Sudafed for one day
On a completely unrelated note, the lady in my office who only eats raw food is wearing pleather pants. That’s a lot to handle.
A pelican has fallen in love with the wildlife officer who nursed it back to health.
The pink-backed pelican, a native to sub-Saharan Africa, escaped from a wildlife park on the Isle of Man in October and flew to Northumberland, where it was found suffering from blood poisoning.
The bird, having been taken into care by the Scottish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (SSPCA), soon started to show signs of affection towards Alexis Bailey, one of the charity’s workers. It displayed mating rituals whenever she entered the room and bit others who approached.
Ms Bailey, 47, who has worked at the SSPCA for eight years, said yesterday that she had never seen anything like it.
“We responded to a call to take in a sick pelican one night in October, and I was the person on hand,” she said. “I came in, gave him his antibiotics and got him settled down for the night. He seems to have been in love with me ever since.
“He looks right into my eyes and puts on what I can only describe as a mating display, with his wings up and his head bowed down. He’ll walk over to me, snuggle in and preen me. He loves to take my hair or my hand in his mouth and he also plays with my shoelaces.”
Ms Bailey added: “It’s only me, for some reason. If I’m not around he’ll tolerate someone else feeding him his fish but as soon as I appear he goes for them.
“He gets in between and his wings go up, his mouth opens wide and he lunges at them, snapping his big beak. He’ll bite if they’re not quick enough to get out of the way. I feel terrible because I know it can be very painful. He has bitten staff, volunteer helpers and the vet.”
The SSPCA was contacted after the bird, which has been nicknamed Romeo, turned up at Haggerston Castle Holiday Park in Northumberland two months ago. It appeared suddenly on a lake in the park. It had blood poisoning, having been attacked by other wildlife, and was kept inside a caravan for warmth until the charity arrived and took it to a rehabilitation centre in Fife.
As she prepared for the bird’s return to Curraghs Wildlife Park on the Isle of Man, Ms Bailey voiced concern about its future without her. “I’m hoping he’ll get over me when he sees other pelicans again,” she said.
Nick Pinder, general manager of the wildlife park, said that he could not comment on the bird’s behaviour, but added that it may have been overwhelmed by the novelty of human contact. He said: “The pelicans are in a one-acre paddock with a lake and other pelicans and they only come to the edge to be fed, so that is the closest they normally come to human contact.”
Ms Bailey added: “I haven’t encouraged this bird. Other staff members have spent more time in its company than me. Everyone tries to be nice to him but he has become attached to me. My colleagues laugh and make jokes, saying he thinks I’m his mate, or that I must have been a pelican in a past life. But I feel quite guilty.”
via: The Times of London
